The Woman At The Well

Peter’s Hour of the Cross

Around the campfire in the courtyard of Caiaphas I sit. Memories surface with each spark of fire; memories are buzzing like angry gnats. Memories disturb my uneasy being; I am quaking with fear of someone discovering who I am. It is something I also ask myself. Who am I? Is this my hour of suffering? I am thinking of self, not the Master, the one I profess to love. I call to mind the words I uttered not so long ago; “To whom can we turn? You have the words of eternal life.” (Jn 6:68) My faith is wavering; the Master needs to see my presence, to feel my support and my love.

I remember Jesus coming to the boat to speak to the crowd; to urge me to put out the nets for a catch- of men not fish, he said. Are the guards here in the courtyard the men I am to show the Way to Jesus? I have not kept my eye on Jesus; I struggle again as I did on the water to reach him.

Those days were idyllic, simple. It was easy for me to follow Jesus; easy to listen to his words about his Father and him. The boat was on an even keel.

Now the waters are turbulent; I am afraid. I want to stop my ears from hearing his words of truth. “You know me and also know where I am from. Yet I did not come on my own but the one who sent me, who you do not know, is true. I know him because I am from him and he sent me. (Jn 7:28) These are words of blasphemy to some; they are words of truth to believers.

Is my human nature in control of my thoughts and actions? I want the Spirit to revive my broken heart. Who is the real me, the real Peter? Is the real Peter the one who attempted to cut off the ear of the soldier in the garden? Is the real me the one only one who followed Jesus after his arrest, albeit at a distance? Is the real Peter the one who has been given a special task- to lead the flock of believers?

Will Jesus still love me with all my faults? Will he see what is inside me- see what is to be for me? This is my hope. This is why Jesus is before Caiaphas. This is why he shoulders all my faults as he goes up the hill to Calvary. Three times I will deny him- Jesus whom I love. He forgives me; he loves me. With his support, his grace, I can go forth to fulfill the purpose for which I was created.

Strength for the Journey

There is a road meant for you to travel. Narrow and steep is the shepherd’s way, and as you say, “Yes,” letting me guide you, I will be strength for the journey.

I will be, I will be, I will be strength for the journey . (Repeat chorus.)

There is a cross meant for you to carry. There is a cross meant for you alone, and as you bow down in humble surrender, I will be strength for the journey. Chorus

How many times have you doubted my word? How many times must I call your name? And as you say, “Yes,” letting me love you, I will be strength for the journey.

I will be, I will be, I will be strength for the journey. I will be, I will be, I will be strength for the journey.

Michael John Poirrier